An Old Post From my Soulcast Blog.

Written Jan. 23, 2007 after a heavy disagreement with someone close. Rather melancholy but I’ll share it just the same. 🙂

Today I miss your smile. I miss the way we used to laugh together, at the same things, out of pure silliness. Now we’re on different paths. I’m no longer a part of the codependent group. I’ve stepped outside the bounds of the family and I am no longer welcomed as one of you.

Today I miss your friendship. I miss the way we used to do things together, hang out, dance, sing, laugh, play. Now I am far away by my own choice. I cannot spend moments with you, even should I have the time to do so. I’ve moved away from easy reach and I can no longer play like we once did.

Today I miss your point of view. I miss the way we saw eye to eye, on life, on love, on family, on freedom. Now my eyes are opened to a way of life that is different from yours. I no longer see things the same way you do, believe the same fallacies you do. I’ve grown beyond your capacity to understand and I cannot drive my mind back into the confines of the cage it once inhabited.

Today I miss your comfort. I miss the closeness we had emotionally in a troubled moment. I’ve gotten so cold, as though the rejection I see in your eyes reaches out a physical hand to facilitate my shivering. Yet to go back to what I was is to go back to the prison of the Past. I cannot move forward in growth if my emotions cease to change for the better.

Today I miss the past. I miss the way it was with you, the familiarity, the security. I have reached for the moon, the stars, the Future. I have flown beyond your best imaginings and I am free. It saddens me to let you go. But I must if I am to take flight on the wings of Forever. And I must do it alone.


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